I got to the venue about an hour early and stood outside in the cold for about 15 to 20 minutes with some pretty cool people. One thing that amazes me is how much people dress up for shows. Some of you may recall the times i went to Ani DiFranco shows wearing a T-Shirt that i had to have everyone see so i didn't wear my trademark sweatshirt that day, or maybe you might recall a certain idiot with a bottle of bubbles and bunny ears. At any rate, i had opted not to dress up for this show, deciding to put on as much warm clothing as i could. This is an important detail for later.
When they finally let us into the venue there was all this great music playing over the house speakers. It's always interesting to see what is played as "crowd enters and settles themselves" music. Sometimes it's really appropriate and the band uses it to get the crowd ready for whatever it is they're going to do and sometimes it's one of those "What the FUCK?" moments. Tonight's music was a mix of Louis Armstrong, John Coultraine, Miles Davis, Count Bassey and other great jazz stuff. some people bitched about it but by and large, everyone dug it. The thing that i noticed most was how mny people were smoking and drinking at this place. Some of you have been to shows with me and know that i don't really have a problem with people doing that stuff as long as it doesn't really impact me, it just struck me as odd in this situation. Henry Rollins co-created the Straight Edge movement way back when with Ian MacKaye (Minor Threat, Fugazi). One would think that more sXe kids would come out to his shit, but i only saw one Straight Edge sweatshirt in the whole crowd. Odd.
Anyway, the show opened with Rollins coming out and doing this fucking hilarious lip-synch rendition of "Ice Ice Baby." The only one who could have done the dance better was Vanilla Ice himself. The crowd fucking loved it.
Those of you who have been forced to sit in a car with me and listen to Rollins know what some of his recorded shows sound like. I learned that these were not nights where the stars were just right and for some reason everything came off better than usual. His shit really is all improv and has that much intensity to it. Topics ranged from September 11th (or as he called it "the 'plane hitting the building' show"), Ozzy Osborne's New Years eve party, the H3 Hummer ("the name should be changed. why don't we call them The Dickhead?"), and Johnny Cash. A two hour set and the guy never lost the crowd once. Amazing.
Once the show ended, i wandered up near the stage, hoping to get an autograph on the off chance that he wandered back out to get his bottle of water, but the security guards threw me and the other autograph seekers out into the cold. Please note, when i got to the venue it was seven o'clock and was about 20 degrees actual temperature. Now it was 11:30 and it was windy. Me and the other maniacs are standing on barren concrete with no wind blocks like trees or buildings or anything. we are standing in what feels like 2 degrees actual temperature with a wind chill of about -8. Fortunately i had put on Long Johns and so only my feet and hands were cold. Everyoneelse had dressed up and had to make sure everyone saw their band t-shirt or their boobs or whatever. This was really ill-advised for standing outside hoping that some guy who is sitting inside in the warm kicking back with a coke and a Miles Davis CD will suddenly think to himself "Hey, i think i'll go freeze my monkey ass off and sign my name a bunch of times!"
While we waited (yes, i was crazy enough to wait) we cracked jokes and sang songs to try to keep ourselves occupied and keep our minds off our toes dropping off. In a true testement to how small the world is, a girl i was talking to asked me why i was singing the Monkee's theme. I told her i got an entire line of Ani DiFranco fans to sing "Yellow Submarine" while we waited in line in Madison Wisconsin (not an easy feat when you consider the line wrapped around the building twice). The girl looked at me and said "That was you?" It turned out she was at that show and still told people the story about how the line spontaneously broke into song one day. My influence has been felt!
So anyway, By the time Henry Rollins came out the first thing he said was "Man! I thought you would have all come to your senses and gone home by now!" By that point i had whittled my "OH MY GOD YOU'RE HENRY ROLLINS I THINK YOU'RE FUCKING AWSOME BLA BLA BLA" speech down to six words. "Thanks for all the inspiration, Henry." he looked at me, standing there shivering and thanked me for coming and signed my poster and the CD booklet that he had to pry out of my frozen fingers.
I gradually warmed up on the 85 minute drive north. Dave Brubeck on the stereo and a cup of gas station coffee warming my shivering right hand as i reflected on how lucky i was to not have people i admire turn out to be assholes. At least, none have yet.